When Leadership Fails: Navigating Dysfunctional Workplaces

In recent months, many of my clients have shared similar, troubling experiences: dysfunctional workplaces where communication is unclear, management is emotionally volatile, and expectations are wildly unrealistic. They tell me about being gaslit, micromanaged, excluded, or even humiliated in front of others.

What makes it worse? These behaviors are often cloaked in fake professionalism, polite smiles, and performative wellness slogans.

One woman shared that her Hiring Manager! admitted that she was only hired because a company was desperate to fill the role. Another described how her manager lacked basic leadership skills, took everything personally with defence, and even broke data protection regulations by mishandling contracts.

These aren’t just examples of "bad management." They point to a deeper dysfunction rooted in emotional immaturity, insecurity, and fear.

And these examples are alarmingly becoming more and more common.

What’s Really Going On Here?

Toxic behavior at work is often a symptom of unprocessed inner issues of senior management.

When someone in power is emotionally reactive, controlling, passive-aggressive, or avoids accountability, they aren’t leading from confidence. They’re leading from fear:

• Fear of being exposed as incompetent.

• Fear of losing authority.

• Fear of not being liked.

Why? Because they feel threatened. A confident, emotionally healthy leader welcomes feedback, empowers their team, and communicates openly and timely.  An insecure one does the opposite, creating an unsafe and unpredictable environment.

They use their role to protect themselves—at the expense of everyone else. But their behavior? It says everything about them, and nothing about you. However, it can leave a mark.

How This Affects You?

The longer you stay in a dysfunctional environment, the more likely it is to wear you down. I've seen clients who are confident, driven, and enthusiastic—but after months (or years) of gaslighting, unclear expectations, or emotional manipulation, they became anxious, uncertain, and emotionally exhausted. Or had a breakdown.

They started second-guessing themselves. They stopped speaking up. They started questioning if they’re the problem.

Let me be very clear: You are not the problem!

What Can You Do?

If quitting isn’t an immediate option, here are some practical tools that can help you cope, protect your peace, and prepare for what’s next:

1. Ground Yourself in Reality

Keep a private log of your accomplishments, finished projects & positive feedback. Also, keep a log of unhealthy feedback and interactions in case you have to bring the issue to HR.

2. Set Emotional Boundaries

Not every passive-aggressive comment deserves your emotional energy. Learn to pause, breathe, and respond—not react. Repeat to yourself “This is NOT about me or the value of my work” as many times as you should to start feeling calmer.

3. Limit Over-Explaining

You don’t owe long justifications for every decision. The more you over-explain, the more power you give away. Only give factual, constructive explanations. Status, date, next steps.

4. Use Micro-Boundaries

Take your lunch break. Log off at the agreed time. Protect your off-hours like your mental health depends on it—because it does.

5. Plan Your Exit (If Needed)

Toxic workplaces rarely change unless there’s a major shift in leadership. If you're in survival mode, if your sleep is affected, you dread Mondays, begin exploring your next step. Polish your CV. Dream again about a better way to earn money and feel purpose.

A Personal Note

The world needs better leadership—and that starts with people like you choosing to rise above dysfunction, not absorb it.

I’ve worked with too many smart, emotionally intelligent, high-performing people who were made to feel small by environments that couldn’t handle these qualities. That’s what keeps me passionate about coaching and helping you.

You shouldn’t have to shrink or  dumb down to survive. You shouldn’t have to second-guess your worth because someone else doesn’t know how to lead. 

If you’re stuck in a place that doesn’t honor who you are, know this: you can get out. You can feel better. And you can find or create a work environment that actually feels like a fit.

Let’s build a work life (and a mindset) that you don’t need to recover from.

Jelena | Life Coach